http://glitterbye-dece.blogspot.com/

So I stopped my birth control back in November. I was on it because I have never had regular periods before. I have since lost about 50lbs and thought that maybe the weight loss would help put things back on track. So for the last 7 months I have been RIGHT on track, I ovulate on the days I am supposed to (i take tests) and I bleed on the days I am supposed to. But in April I was a week early..i ignored it. Then May I was a few days late…then June and no period. I am now about 5 days late so I have written off my period for this month.

I am disheartened. I was hoping I would be normal and i’m not. I was excited that I was actually ovulating, which means I would be able to have a kid someday…but now its all kind of floating away.

I need to make a gyno appt to make sure I dont have a cyst on my remaining ovary (left one was taken out in 2003 due to PCOS)…but I am scared.

Last week of the two classes I am taking then one more and I will have a shiny new associates and and extra 20 credits towards a bachelors.

Via reshapethenation.com
9lbs lost so far

Some cute pics of wyatt to distract you from my tiny post.

The story was touching and heartwrenching and truely stood out in it’s time…and written by a woman no less! Seeing these things written in the 1800′s by women just make me feel empowered. These women were strong and independant and had sass…I commend them!

On another note, I took my half ambien last night and laid down at 10pm….after just laying there for hours I finally got up at about 1am and took the other half. About 30 minutes later I fell asleep. So I am a little tired today. Instead of coffee I went for a lavender tea, which was delicious.!

I have been on ambien for 4 years now. Just suddenly one day 4 years ago I lost the ability to fall asleep. I could be exhausted and barely functional but my brain refused to switch from exhausted twilight stage to actual sleep. After about a week of not sleeping I begged the dr for something and he gave me a prescription for ambien. One time when I wanted to stop taking it I just went without for a night…boy was THAT a mistake. I was awake all night then the next day I was SO irritable and out of it. I felt like every sound was a vibration…in short, I was going crazy. I cried myself to sleep at like 2pm and slept for hours. I was equally disoriented and angry when I woke up. That night I took my ambien and decided perhaps dosing down was best. I did that and got down to ¼ but something happened and I went back up. So now here I am trying again. Part of me feels it might be a bit pointless as I’m pretty sure whatever it was that initially caused my chemicals to be wacked probably has not bettered itself and that needs to be solved first, but even half is better.

The coffee addiction is a recent thing, it started when my ex got me a fancy new coffee maker and some beans in November and I was grinding my own super strong cups of coffee then downing 4 cups. 4 cups of my homemade coffee is =8 cups regular coffee. So this habit should be easy to break, I will drink more tea and maybe mix a decaf with my regular to have the stronger taste I like but with less caffeine.

Still have 2.5 hours left of work, lets hope I can make it!